


Stress

by CourfeyROCKS



Category: les mis
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-12
Updated: 2015-10-12
Packaged: 2018-04-26 02:44:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4987051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CourfeyROCKS/pseuds/CourfeyROCKS
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Enjolras' doubt begins to grow after a long day of messing things up on accident.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stress

**Author's Note:**

> I should really stop writing things about Enjolras suffering.  
> Maybe I should write one about Gavroche suffering instead. I dunno though. Writing Enjolras slowly breaking down into nothing shouldn't be as fun as it is but HERE WE ARE.
> 
> I hope you enjoy :D

Enjolras sat in his room, holding his head in his hands. He felt like garbage, nothing he did was working. Nothing was going how he had planned it. He wished that for once, things would just go how they were supposed to, but they never would.

Because Enjolras was trying to change things so diligently, he had been enormously stressed out. Due to this, he ended up snapping at people that didn’t deserve it. He accidentally had yelled at Grantaire to shut up. He told Marius that if he didn’t stop talking about Cosette he would use him as part of the barricade. And then when Feuilly tried to cheer him up by saying,

“I’m you’re biggest fan”, he ended getting a death glare from Enjolras and him responding with,

“If you say that again and I’ll shove a fan up your ass.” He always ended up apologizing later, and saying that he hadn’t meant it. Enjolras cringed thinking about it, and shook his head vigorously trying not to think about it. He covered his eyes and groaned.

“How am I so stupid?” He asked. “Why the hell did I say that? They didn’t mean any harm. What kind of a friend am I?” He sighed. “I would take all of that back if I could..” Nothing felt right at that moment. He thought his friends would be mad at him, and what if they decided to leave the revolution? What would happen then? 

Enjolras felt himself beginning to cry. He hadn’t wept in a while, and he preferred to keep it that way. He never liked to cry. But that’s exactly what happened. He began to sob. Alone. No one would hear him. No one would know. He would force himself suffer in silence, and that was that.

‘Have I failed them?’ He asked himself. ‘Have I not proved myself enough? Am I no longer fit to lead them?’ Questions filled his mind, and he felt a wave of doubt come over him. Single moments turned into agonizing hours of confusion and feeling discouraged. He tried to force himself to feel better, but nothing would help at this point. All he could do is hope that things would turn out to be okay for everyone. He thought about his friends and sobbed harder. He wanted Marius to live so he could marry Cosette. He wanted Joly to become the best doctor that ever lived. He wanted Grantaire to be happy. He wanted so many things for them all. But at this point, he feared none of it would ever happen.


End file.
